I have been doing a lot of thinking recently. And I’m an overthinker. I tend to overthink everything. EVERYTHING. BUT what I recently came to realize is that I can’t sit still. I always feel like I need to be doing something. And while I didn’t think much of it, I started to realize the effect it was having on me.
I pulled away from certain people and things I was doing. I kept thinking of whatever I needed to do next and not think about the present. I constantly have so many different thoughts and feelings going throughout me. And although I understand it sometimes, there are many times that I don’t understand it. Anyways, it came to the point where I realized that I probably should talk to someone about what I was thinking and feeling. I wanted to find validation in what I was thinking and feeling and obviously just talking to my husband, friends or family wasn’t helping the way I had hoped. So I reached out and searched for a therapist. Someone that I could talk about my feelings with, talk about my thoughts, and help me pause with what I thought was going on. Now there’s a key word right there, PAUSE. Could I do that? I thought I could. And within the first session, I realized I could. I could pause. I could slow down and feel being in the present. It’s not that I couldn’t. It’s that I wouldn’t let myself.
And I saw more to myself. I kept a lot of feelings and thoughts inside. They didn’t need to be. I didn’t need to keep to myself as much as I usually do. I need to talk about my feelings and the thoughts that I had running around in my head. I know that I am a very emotional person. Regardless of the news, I may have just heard, whether it be good, bad, sad, etc., my initial reaction is to cry. It doesn’t matter what the circumstance, that’s how I start to deal and feel about it.
So I’ve incorporated some meditation into my daily routine/things I do daily (which I will talk about in another post). I set a reminder on my phone to tell me when I should meditate. This helps me slow down and reset with what I have going on. I was actually doing this before, but I fell off the bandwagon, so to say. And I recently started again, which I think will be a great help to me.
And if I need a few seconds to myself while at home, I ask my husband to chill with the kiddos for a bit while I go meditate or just close my eyes and take a few deep breaths. And he does the same sometimes. We’re holding each other accountable.
So I’m learning to slow things down for myself. To take a pause daily. To meditate and reset for the day. I’m learning to focus on the present and not in the future (as much as I want to think about the future). I’m working on it. It’s hard, but I will do it.
Do you pause on a daily basis? Do you slow down and enjoy the moments?